Parent Community and Forum - Blog: Ever have one of theses days?
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  • Blog: Ever have one of these days?

    Just like the book, yesterday was a terrible, no good, very bad day. I think every home school family must have an occasional day like that but when you have a child with special needs the day can spiral rapidly down into a complete disaster. Today, looking back I can see where things went wrong, and I can see *gulp* that if I would have handled things in the beginning much differently the whole day wouldnít have been a total loss. Looking at the brighter side, days like yesterday are a rarity, but when we started our homeschooling journey almost 8 years ago, days like that were more common.

    What was my mistake yesterday? (well, one of many of them) After a weeklong break I jumped into something in math that my son knew years ago. It was a very simple task, and he could not do it. It was as if he had never seen it before. I became frustrated, he became frustrated, and I lost my patience and cool with him. This resulted in him having a complete meltdown that kept resurfacing for most of the day despite the fact that I put the school work away for the day. MAJOR MAMA GUILT. It carried in to when we went shopping for dinner. A teenager melting down like a 3 year old is not a pretty sight.

    My son recently turned 14 and I have found this last year to be more of a learning experience for me than for him. He is almost an adult and I am realizing more and more that there are certain things he is not going to be able to learn and no matter how hard I push, it will not happen. On the other hand I have been on the lookout for the many things that he is learning and has the potential to learn . Iím also trying to become more aware of what skills he needs to achieve his own potential. Not the potential I want for him.

    This mama is realizing over the years that educating a child with significant special needs goes way beyond teaching them the set goals that most children are going to need to know to further their education beyond high school. For my son college isnít a possibility but there are other possibilities out there for him to become a happy and productive member of society. To do this I am having to be more perceptive and being wise enough to see his many strengths and talents, and the ways that I can build on those strengths.

    As for me I asked my son for forgiveness in the way I handled things yesterday. In the past I would have held onto that guilt for too long but I am learning that it makes much more sense to learn from my own mistakes and move on.
    Comments 2 Comments
    1. topsytechie's Avatar
      topsytechie -
      I cringe when I realize that I'm STILL holding onto some of the super bad homeschool days we had in the past. Where, to be completely honest, the meltdowns were more mine than the kiddos. I can so easily resort into guilt mode when I remember those. The boys have probably long forgotten when mama "went to her dark place." So why can't I?! Thanks for this beautiful post on remembering what's important in our educational journey and learning to forgive and grow!
    1. Joyfulmama's Avatar
      Joyfulmama -
      Let the guilt go topsy...as I know your kids and they are AWESOME. Yep...it was a full blown 43 year old tantrum and my A~man showed me complete grace for my actions, like I would never see in most people. Thanks for your comment too.
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