help with an unmotivated, slow to get going but then flies through work, daughter
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Thread: help with an unmotivated, slow to get going but then flies through work, daughter

  1. #1
    marshaabbey is offline Junior Member
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    Default help with an unmotivated, slow to get going but then flies through work, daughter

    I'm frustrated, I can't get my 12 yr. old going. All I hear is, I don't know how or I need help. Once she gets going, she rushes, does a poor, sloppy job. I have all kinds of rewards set up, but we can't even make it to 1 reward, so I end up threatening instead. I have to be in the room every second, she either
    has a question or is flailing around in her chair. I can't get her to care about anything but mine craft. It's so hard to be nice and positive to her, I'm just frustrated and angry. This is our 3rd week. Anyone have a kid like this and been able to turn things around?

  2. #2
    hearthstone_academy's Avatar
    hearthstone_academy is offline Administrator
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    Don't give her a reason to slop through or rush. I told my kids no TV, computer, videogames during "school hours" (9-4), whether they were finished with their actual school work or not. They could play board games, create something with craft supplies or Legos, read, dance, work on Scout badges or 4H projects and so forth.

    It didn't always work. Nothing always works for all kids.

    Sometimes the offer of too many rewards can be overwhelming or give them the idea that school is an "extra" that is deserving of a reward . . . instead of something that simply must. be. done.

    That said . . . Minecraft is really educational, and there are homeschool curriculums based on Minecraft! There is at least one Facebook group for those who are using Minecraft for homeschool, so you might consider looking in to that. If you don't want to go full-on Minecraft, some of the Minecraft lessons might at least serve as motivation to get her other schooling finished.

    Good luck with this tough situation.
    Makani249 and anj1981 like this.

    Mom of six . . . current students and homeschool graduates. Enjoying using Time4Learning since 2006!

  3. #3
    itsren is offline Junior Member
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    marshaabbey, I have two kids like you described. My oldest (8th grader, age 13) is still in public school, and at this point, I know I could not homeschool him. He aggravates me just a little too much. My youngest (6th grader - age 11) is like that as well, but not quite as bad as his older brother. His twin is also still in public school, but she's doing great there. I have absolutely no advice to give to you. Today was my 2nd day homeschooling. But, I wanted to let you know that you are not alone.

    Kelly, I love all the ideas you posted above. Thank you! I will try some of them.

  4. #4
    marshaabbey is offline Junior Member
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    Thank you so much for your reply! I love the mine craft idea! I think I am being too much of a softy. She was not sure about homeschooling, so I think I was afraid if it was too hard or mom was too mean, she would want to go back to public school. I probably need to tighten up the reigns and tell her to suck it up!

  5. #5
    marshaabbey is offline Junior Member
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    itsren, how is it going? We finished our 3rd week. I have absolutely no idea how we are doing! lol I think she's learning-I know I am! 6th grade is hard!! Kelly has some great ideas, I am trying to implement some of them!

  6. #6
    Joecross98 is offline Junior Member
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    In our first year of homeschooling our son, third grade, it felt like we spent most of our time getting our son to do the work. It was SO frustrating as a parent, the arguing, threats etc. But as we start our second year, I think that this behavior was all part of our son getting a grip on what homeschooling would be...it is a tremendous change, and he was testing if we were going to be consistent in requiring him to do the work. I needed support, a place to vent and talk about his behavior, so I could keep going. My husband and I also spent a lot of time talking about to him about his responsibility in learning. A year later, my son's new years resolution, self created, was not to "dilly dally" getting started on his work. I just about fell over when he said it and it is reflective of the change he has made. I dont think we did any thing magical just stuck through it with him. He is also a minecraft junkie...

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