Introduction and how to moderate usage?
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  1. #1
    Shari is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    Default Introduction and how to moderate usage?

    My name is Shari and we live in New Mexico. I have 5 children in my home, some that are mine and some that are fostered. My 4 year old son is the reason for my participation in this website.

    I'm told he's brilliant, or profoundly gifted. Speculation is running rampant as to what his IQ will actually be when he's old enough to be tested. I started homeschooling him after I was told repeatedly that he was entirely too "resource intensive" for the programs offered in my state. The New Mexico Association of Gifted and Talented Children told me that their best advice to me was to move, that my state has nothing for a child like him.

    So here I am.....

    My son loves this program, there lies the problem. In the first 3 days he completed 156 line items on the report. Part of the reason for the speed at which he is traveling is that alot of the current material is known, but he is finding alot that he hasn't been exposed to as well, particularly social studies and science. He is obsessed with the need to finish it all. I explained to him that it changes everyday, that it's not possible to "finish". I have limited his computer time as much as possible, but he's back on here every time I turn my back. I would love to hear from others who's children started the same way. Should I just let him go and hope that once the newness wears off he'll slow down? He is currently signed up for 2nd grade and the way he's going he won't be for long. He is completely fascinated with all there is to learn.

    I could use some advice!!
    Your Character is who you are, Your Reputation is who people think you are...

  2. #2
    Mommydynee is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    Shari,

    Having a chld that is 'gifted' brings mixed feelings. I have a dd that is very advanced in some subjects, but probably not as much as your child. I'm excited that she learns so quickly but then it puts her in a category by herself much of the time which interfers with social life. We have found that keeping her mind busy but disciplined has helped. I personally don't want her to be so far ahead of her peers that she is in college by age 14. My cousin was like that and has spent a very lonely life. Though he mentally could keep up with the college level he was not physically mature enough and that caused problems.

    Try to find an area that your child really enjoys and let him run with that while also keeping a lid on his discipline. He doesn't need to be at the computer all day. He needs to learn to be a kid too. Teach him to enjoy the outdoors and how to appreciated the wonders of life around him. This is easier said than done but helping him develop into a well rounded person will do both you and him great good and may be a great blessing to the world as he learns.

    Our dd enjoys clay molding and similar crafts so we give her all the freedom possible for her imagination to run in this area. It is truly amazing what she can come up with. She also loves animals and has a couple of pets that she tends to. We use this has a method to 'slow' her down some in other areas. That might not work for you, but it does for us.

    I'd be interested to see what other parents have to say, too.

  3. #3
    TheosMom is offline Junior Member Newbie
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    Default Moderating Usage

    Theo and I are new to the site (just signed up last night), but I've lived with a "gifted" child for six years now. It's both an amazing and exhausting experience, isn't it?

    We do not curtail Theo's learning activities at all. We saw a psychologist a couple of years ago who specializes in gifted children and a picture/IQ test was performed. It was suggested that we give him free reign. To moderate Theo would be to stifle his thirst for knowledge. It was explained to us that Theo's brain does not work the same way that ours does. Knowledge is as necessary as breathing to him. And that he was placed on this earth for a reason. Our job is to nurture him and give him what he needs to reach his full potential. And we do. (I did draw a line at the cadaver he wanted for Christmas last year so that he could learn to dissect for real)

    We do not homeschool, however, so I don't know if that makes a difference. Public school was not an option for us. Theo lasted three days in Kindergarten before we were called. Both my husband and I spent time sitting in that classroom in an attempt to get the teacher to understand how to work with a child like Theo. Instead, we learned that the atmosphere was stifling him. So, we send Theo to a special school in our area that started as a daycare and has, over the last 20 or so years, evolved to a private school. And Theo has flourished. He isn't in any grade. Instead, the school spends time with him to figure out what he knows and what he doesn't and fills in the gaps. It's really amazing.

    He does not play like other children. Toys gather dust, but books are battered from reading. He has a computer and we do not put any restrictions on his surfing at this point. He could pass a high school biology class with no problems due to his self-learning. Yes, there have been some daunting conversations, but that's life in our household. We just take a deep breath and answer his questions the best that we can and use the internet when we don't know the answer.

    But I digress.... You need to do what your gut tells you to do because you know your child best. Is he excited about his learning and is he proud of his accomplishments? Or is he looking at this as a task that needs to be finished as quickly as possible so that he can move on? That's what you need to figure out, then make your decisions from there.

    Best Wishes!

  4. #4
    Stephanie739's Avatar
    Stephanie739 is offline Senior Member
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    Wow that's incredible - he is so hungry to learn. Its great to have a program like this to constantly feed his mind.

    Before I go on, I'll tell you my opinions and parenting styles are generally much more lenient and child led than many others. With that said,

    I would let him go at it. You can always introduce other items (especially art and music) take field trips, etc., but he is like a sponge, and this program will teach him so many wonderful things. I think people at certain times in their lives just crave knowledge, and its my opinion to embrace it - not restrain it.

    This is a good program - you can rest assured knowing he will be filling his mind with good things. He might come to a roadblock, boredom or difficulty, or fly through honors algebra in the next year, but if he wants to learn the material, I would give him the reigns, and let him decide the pace.

    Personally, I do think a child may not be emotionally ready for college at 10, 12...but nowadays with computer based learning you can let him soak up college level knowledge without having to be exposed to the adult living so early. Even Ivy League schools offer online classes....

    Good luck and Welcome!
    ~Stephanie

    mom to:
    Tori (13)
    Meghan (9)
    Andy (5)

  5. #5
    Stephanie739's Avatar
    Stephanie739 is offline Senior Member
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    One more thing, you can look for certain topics that are of more interest to him. If he leans towards one or two areas (I'm thinking about my girl's love for the astronomy section) embrace his interests.....find ways to expand on them......
    ~Stephanie

    mom to:
    Tori (13)
    Meghan (9)
    Andy (5)

  6. #6
    SahmIam is offline Senior Member
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    I have a friend with a child like that and she limits his "homeschool" time to one day per week. In that one day he still learns as much as my kids probably do in a month, so he's not being held back in any way. There are more ways to learn than sitting at a computer, so if he's that obsessed with it, you as his parent have a responsibility to lead him in a different direction.

    It would be sad for him to shut himself off from the rest of the world because he's gotten so interested in "book learning." Be sure to get him out and about where he can apply the knowlege he's attaining and find out where he needs help. Some kids that are very smart don't like to work with certain ideas (like they only enjoy the concrete or only the abstract) or in certain situations (like they only want to do 2-D or only 3-D projects). Maybe they love math but have no interest in art, or vice versa. Find out what his interests are and try to develop them in a more complete way. You'll be helping him to become a better adjusted person in the long run.
    Melissa.

  7. #7
    ABK
    ABK is offline Member
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    I am NO expert in this field but do want to add a very important point of view. All the knowledge in the world will do absolutely no good if you never learn to apply it in your daily life. Embrace the learning and if your family feels it is apprpriate let him/her fly with unlimited information. Keep an eye on subject content and re-enforce those subjects into everyday life.

    I had a relative that was very bright, had a photographic memory, knew about 12 languages etc, but had no problem solving skills or common sense. It was very sad to see this very brilliant man unable to find happiness or comfort in the world around him. He turned to alcohol to numb the lonliness and shame of his struggles.

    My advice find the balance with learning educational information and life
    skills. A well rounded child is the goal that most of us are looking for.

    Best of luck and please keep us updated on the progress.
    Amy
    Vivian - 15
    Elizabeth - 9
    Donna - 7

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